Some sixteen chapters ago, I took a leap of faith and asked you to take it with me. I asked you to consider that greater happiness is not so hard to achieve, and I admit that it seems implausible.
I put forward quite a number of propositions that might or might not have been new to you. Foremost among these is that all our emotions are not external to us, nor are they ultimately controlled by external circumstances. If nothing else, I hope I have in some way communicated my unwavering belief that we can manage our own emotions almost entirely, regardless of the circumstances outside our bodies.
While allowing for complexity in our minds and personalities, I have tried to stress that it is largely conditioning that has shaped our emotional makeup, and that conditioning can fairly readily be extinguished by 'snapping out of it' – by 'shaking up our Etch A Sketch'.
This manual is certainly nothing more than one man's description of the tools he uses to be mostly happy most of the time. Since starting out on this writing trip, I have been exercising, just as I have been bold enough to ask you to exercise. What I've found is that I am still an imperfect player, as I am an imperfect coach. On some days I remember that my thinking is being affected by my emotions, and that I have a whole supermarket full of emotions to choose from. On other days, I find pockets of time in which I'm completely unaware of both my thinking and my emotions.
Demanding as it might be, I'm staying on this track because it works for me, even if I am not a perfect advertisement for it. And I'm staying on track because I feel better each week, if not each day (it's a 'sawtooth graph'). So I can say that I suggest nothing to anyone that I am not prepared to do myself ... and that includes making mistakes. I have suggested that you list 100 great emotions you would like to recall at will, and some mistakes will obviously happen with such a tall order. If we imagine each desired emotion as a muscle that we have within us, but perhaps a weak and flabby muscle, then as we exercise each muscle we can congratulate ourselves for daily progress, but not expect perfection.
There is no need for me to repeat what is found in the previous chapters. I remain convinced that for some people, a great deal will be gained by exercise and practice of these tips and techniques that I respectfully place before you for your consideration. Now that my little manual has come to an end, I wish merely to say that if over these 18 weeks you have found some tools that make sense, and work, then you will find that 18 weeks is just a beginning. Practice and repetition will, I believe, make them work even better.
Does this negate my original claim that we can
Feel better
Think better
Dramatically
easily
– when now I am saying that continued practice will improve your results? I trust not. True, we can't feel, think or act perfectly well in an instant, if all our muscles are flabby. But if I were to say to you that you can ride a bicycle 'dramatically, easily and quickly', you must allow that a little learning and practice will be involved at first.
You might recall that in the opening chapters I spoke of 1 per cent growth each day. I would like to finish off by reminding you of this. If this manual has made sense to you, I want to suggest that you continue with its precepts with 1 per cent per day growth in mind.
To get the benefits that I think the 16 Precepts of my Manual have to offer, may I suggest that you revisit and re-read them? You and I will both find that if we don't, after a week or two we might easily forget what those precepts are. You're welcome to print these pages out and keep them where you can refresh your memory. Likewise, perhaps you would like to bookmark the Manual and return regularly. The Precepts above on this page are linked to the appropriate chapters, so you might like to surf them.
I thank you for the kindness and respect you have shown me by reading this far. I am today all that I have ever been: one human being trying to make sense of his own life in a difficult world. Perhaps you can identify with that. My wariness of panaceas and gurus is such that I ask you to be equally wary of what I have written. However, I stress that it has been written in good faith, and I believe it can work if you apply it earnestly. Some readers have already told me that their lives have been changed for the better. To them, and to the undecided reader, may I leave you with just one thought: if these tools work at all, they will work best when they aren't rusty.
I'm grateful for your interest in reading my little book. I wish every reader greater happiness, and if such blessing should be yours because of the happiness that has risen in my life out of the flames of my former misery and despair, then I have even more happiness in my life than I bargained for. So, bright blessings to you, dear reader, and I send my sincere wish that whichever path you take, and whichever tools you put in your toolkit, your life will be increasingly rich with happiness and good feelings.
Goodbye for now. Elvis has left the building.
Abundance and gratitude,
Pip Wilson
The FeelGood Manual is now available as a printed book
Progress, not perfection!
Happiness is not for sale.
Freewill contributions, according to what you think this is worth,
are gratefully accepted for the continuation of this work.
(Supporters of this manual please click)
© Copyright, Pip Wilson, 2002-now
